30 DAYS TO TAMING YOUR TONGUE - DAY 3

DAY 3 THE MANIPULATING TONGUE

Manipulation is an attempt to influence someone’s behavior in order to achieve a desire outcome. Manipulators are masters at exploiting the fears, weaknesses and insecurities of others. Their motives are not always purely selfish.  Sometimes manipulators have controlling personalities and simply feel that they know what’s best for all concerned. They have a hard time accepting the fact that other people have a free will and a right to make good or bad decisions for their lives.

Manipulators employ various tactics in order to get their way: flattering or over complimenting, kissing up, attempting to produce guilt by blaming or shaming, distorting the truth, withholding information, pretending to be hurt emotionally, appealing to other’s insecurities or ego, practice false humility, make subtle threats, crying, nagging, hinting or making indirect comments, using financial enticements, any other behavior that will tug at the emotions of their victims.

The story of Samson and Delilah is the perfect story of manipulation, Samson was a chosen man of God, but he was drawn to ungodly women. God gave him super strength as long as he never cut his hair. He fell in love with a greedy, conniving Philistine woman named Delilah. After many attempts of using the age old guilt inducing “if you love me, you would” argument, she manipulated Samson into telling his secret of his strength. This unveiling soon brought on Samson’s demised.

Such a tragic end of a strong man who was weaken by a manipulative woman. Manipulation can destroy not only a relationship but also a person’s life.

Manipulation is a crafty use of the tongue and a self-perpetuating vice. One the manipulator finds that their techniques work, they become proud of their “smooth operating” skills. They will use all kinds of indirect tactics ranging from “guilt trips” to portraying themselves as innocent, suffering victims of various circumstances. They may even start to enjoy their ability to influence others in such a manner.

Future more, manipulators lose all credibility once people become aware of their propensity to engage in such behavior. People will suspect that they always have ulterior motives and will avoid them like the plague.

We never read of Jesus manipulating anybody. He always offers everyone better way of life but accepted their decisions to pursue another options even when it was not in their best interest.

Manipulation is deceptive and attempts to take away a person’s freewill choice. God’s children must not practice nor tolerate such behavior.

REFLECTIONS AND READINGS

JUDGES 16:4-22   ROMANS 12:6-8     GALATIANS 1:10

2 CORITHAINS 4:2

1)               From the list of various manipulative tactics, list the behaviors that you have resorted to in the past.

2)              What was Delilah’s motive for manipulating Samson into telling her the secret to his great physical strength? What tactic did she use?

3)              Is there a person in your circle of interaction who tries to manipulate you or someone else?

4)              Read Luke 20:20-26. List at least two manipulation tactics used by the spies who were sent by the Jewish religious leaders to trap Jesus into making an incrimination remarks about paying taxes Roman government? How did Jesus responds?